The Perfect Match (at a Bargain Price)

I have always been the child that was right. Always. Even if I was wrong, I would somehow work the story to where I was right. I was in charge and had a mind of my own. I would show anyone that I knew what I was doing and that I knew better than them. I think many children feel this way.... but even as an adult, I find I still have a little bit of this stubborn trait in me, esp. when it comes to dealing with my parents. Who knew this perceived flaw would lead me to the greatest blessing thus far in my life?

At this age (32) in the south, everyone is worried about your future if you are a single person. The people that love you fear you will be alone for the rest of your days. I have dated regularly over the years and have experienced plenty of Mr. Very Wrongs....and those who love me worried I would never realize it each time....and were all relieved when I finally did. My family and close friends have not been fond of my dating choices the last few years. They all felt I deserved better...and I did too. Tired of the expectations and stress of dating in my thirties, I informed all the ones I love that I was taking a dating hiatus... at least a year off with no male drama in my life. I wanted 'me' time...time to regroup and prioritize. Time to be selfish. I told my parents that I may never get married and that chances were slim to none that a grandchild would come from me. I spent the next year enjoying my wonderful girl-friends and family. I didn't feel lonely nor did I miss the dating game one bit. I think the more I enjoyed myself, the more my Mom worried I would be alone forever. About 6 months into my dating hiatus, my Mom (who doesn't normally try to tell her grown children what to do without them asking) started giving me suggestions on what I should do about my "man-less situation."

My Mom wanted me to sign up for Match.com to meet new guys. See, I am a 32 year old living in a college town. While it has been flattering to be hit on by 20-somethings (many were very cute), I have no desire to be a puma, cougar or any other kind of cat. I also already did the other things that people tell you to do to "get a man"...I went to Church, I went out with friends, I was social... and the 20-somethings were around. But, no 30-somethings...and I am not alone, this goes both ways for people my age in this small, college town. Not only did my Mom see my odds of meeting someone randomly in town as low, she was seeing success from Match.com in others' lives. My sister had two friends who met (and married) great guys on Match.com...and apparently, one of the friends' sister-in-laws met her husband on there as well. Regardless of the fact that 3 people found happiness on there, I insisted it was NOT for me. Honestly, I had the idea that only desperate people would go on the internet to meet a man...and I wouldn't even volunteer myself to be set up on a blind date, much less meet someone on the internet! The start of me being so wrong!

My Mom encouraged and I bucked...this went on from summer to fall. When Christmas shopping time was approaching, I asked my Mom what she wanted for Christmas. In a smarty, motherly tone, my Mom said, "for you to join Match.com for at least 1 month." Well, I had had enough. I was ready to prove to her that I was right and she was wrong. I wanted to end this nonsense. If she wanted me to get stalked or meet crazies, fine..I would show her! So, I went home and pulled up Match.com..and lucky me, they were having a sale! So, I was going to show my Mom how wrong she was and not have to pay full price to do it! Score.

This is the moment where my stubbornness...my need to be right that is often a flaw...turned out to be the best blessing I have thus far in my life. You see, there was this guy on Match.com that had his eyes closed in his profile pic. Yep, his eyes were closed! I clicked on it to laugh and saw the other pictures and a face with a smile that I couldn't forget. It turns out that he was not crazy at all.... he too lives in this small college town. His friends had all gotten married and wanted for him what my Mom wanted for me. So, they passed a hat to get the money and signed him up. One of them has since told me that he was not very happy with them that night either. So two people who started down this road unhappy at the idea are now on the road to happily ever after! Of course, he didn't get me at a bargain price!


Side note:
We have inspired 5 other friends between the two of us to join Match.com and they are all seeing success in dating. It is kinda neat to see. I guess we were the guinea pigs..esp for my friends who would have never thought I would have done something like this! According to a local wedding planner, 30% of his weddings in the small college town now come from internet dating. Amazing, huh? Technology is changing the world! It made my world better!

Oh, and my Mom...she gloats every time she can...but, I can't complain... she was right...that $28.34 was the best money I have ever spent!